I’m back, Motherfleckers.

“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: It goes on.”

Robert Frost.

Apparently now, its almost a year since I wrote anything in here. Barf. Do you know when life ultimately treats you like shit? And you’re like, “why tf do I deserve this ugh, why do I deserve this” blah blah, shut up. Stop pitying yourself. Empathize with yourself. But don’t ever pity, you’re not weak. Admit you’re not okay, ask for help, cry, cry, cry, until it makes you feel better, even if you didn’t know what made you upset in the first place. But don’t pity yourself when you feel like you’re done and give up trying. Don’t ever give up on yourself. I know its easier to say than be done, but I’m not asking you to do it. Try. Try is all. With just the meekest effort. But try.

It might suck. And you might need a lotttttt of time. And you might still be not okay. But when has anything been perfect anyway?

To all those random, nice people who’ve emailed saying this blog is amazing and shit, thanks man. And to all those random *types and erases assholes* who’ve emailed saying this shit is depressing, okay look: Firstly, change your perspective. This is what I’m doing for myself to combat with depression. This is supposed to be against depression and all that crap. And I’m doing it for me. I suck at telling how I feel to someone I know and I bet there are others like this too, and it feels better when taking some effort to understand or to be understood. Secondly, don’t spread hate man, c’mon. Because let me tell you this:

This blog is my truth. And I just want to be honest here. There’s no way I’m changing my truth and what I believe. Also notice, I say this is my truth. Not THE truth. Our faith differs. Our truth differs. But is it really the truth when we all imbibe myriad comprehensions of a story that might not even be singular or plural or universal? Fuck, it might not even exist. But we all like to blind ourselves with this pure, deity, celestial bright white light called “truth,” when it is just another possibility. If truth isn’t truth, then wouldn’t lies not be lies? If what is true to you, is a lie to me; if what I believe is something you reject or dismiss, then who is right and who is wrong, how do we win this tug of war? Or would be sane enough to agree that there isn’t no universal truth or there isn’t a lie? Or is that exactly what insanity is? If everything is a possibility then.. if everything can happen, why the fuck are we all so scared to hope? Why do we give up already?

Pew pew.

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(I randomly began to type this out with no idea where it is headed, I’ll read thru it again and perfect it sometime later maybe, but as for now: I’m back, Motherfleckers #suits)

Feels so good to have typed this bruh.